Bad Tattoos And The Idiots Who Thought They Were A Good Idea

Having recently decided that I want to get my first tattoo I have spoken to a lot of friends about it and done a bit of research online. There are some absolutely amazing tattoo artists out there that have produced some phenomenal pieces of artwork on bodies. I have actually become so impressed that I really can't wait to get mine done.

But, with all good things there has to be the opposite end of the spectrum. There has to be the God awful tattoos that people think are a great idea at the time. Either they are drunk, they have a momentary loss of judgement.....or maybe they really are that retarded.

First on my list of stupid tattoos is not too bad.....well.....you can look. I don't think its the tattoo that bothers me in this pic. I think that is is more the fact that she thinks she looks good showing it off! Hunny, if you want to show off a God awful tattoo, at least have a decent body. The rolls hanging over the jeans just draw attention away from the tattoos and to how nasty of a hick you are. It honestly looks like you are hiding muffins under that muffin top! Just gotta love NASCAR fans.
With this next one, all I have to say is WTF!!! What would ever give you the thought that getting a picture of an ear of corn having sex with a broccoli permanently placed on your body was a good idea!? I mean, I can see the passion between the two vegetables, with the beads of sweat pouring out, but come on. Why!!!??? Then there are the retarded people that believe that the more awful tattoos you get, the better you look. I know that all of us don't have high end jobs that you can't have tattoos showing, but come on! Really!? Why!? I don't even know what "Mr. Cool ICE" is supposed to mean, but dude!? You look like an idiot. And, what's with the goggles on the back of your head!? I just don't understand people sometimes.

I have also realized that people have a fascination with using their belly button to help the visualization of the tattoo in a way that is just a bit over board.

Not only does this guy have a really stupid tat of a cow, but man, you have a HUGE belly button. You can seriously hide stuff in there! Keep an afternoon snack in there in case you get hungry!
This next was is actually pretty funny! For as much as he will regret this someday when his kids ask him why there is a monkey anus on his stomach, it is hilarious.
I don't even want to know what this guys fascination with cat ass is all about. I think this guy has to go see a shrink and talk about his beasteality problems. If anyone sees this stomach go into a pet store, please call the authorities and hide all the felines.
Then, there is the ultimate retarded tattoo for the ultimate retarded woman. This lady sold her forehead on eBay in order to get money to get her son into a private school. She was able to get $10,000 to place a BIG bold advertisement for a casino on her dome! She claimed that since her son had fallen behind in public school that going to private school would help him with his studies. I can tell you right now, if he got his brains from you then no matter where he goes to school he is going to be the last in his class and be known as the kid with the retarded mother who has the tattoo on her forehead!

Weds Night/I Am A Dork Night

For the past several months, every Weds night I have been heading down to one of the local watering holes to help one of my friends, Chuck, entertain the likes of our Dexter's crowd. Entertain how, you ask? Well, we gather all the tone death, and I think even some mentally challenged, all into one room and we give them a mic, play some music and watch what happens.

Chuck has been working with his brother, John, at Evil John Entertainment helping folks enjoy the use of karaoke, Guitar Hero, Rock Band and even sometimes game nights at bars all throughout NJ. I have only recently joined the group to help Chuck out on Weds nights. He basically handles the DJing, while I help people with the Rock Band equipment. But, we both drink and act like fools, so it all works out in the end.

We have been gathering quite a following on for both the karaoke and the Rock Band. A couple weeks ago we decided to experiment and try to split the two up in order to please more people. Unfortunately, like most experiments, it didn't go too well. Since we are only allowed to set up in the front room at Dexter's, Chuck and I were only about 50 ft from each other and basically drowning each other out with our the two different speakers doing battle. It pretty much turned into a cluster fuck of noise and frustration. Even though it was a great idea, because both of us had a full night signed up of people to sing/play, we had to bring the two back together again.

It is actually a really fun night if you are ever in the Riverdale area. We usually have everything set up by 9ish. I start out playing drums on a Rock Band song while Chuck makes fun of me for playing on Easy or Medium, then we head into some karaoke with the occasional RB set. The night usually goes until around 1/1:30 or until Chuck drinks too much and I have to take over the mic. Then everyone just walks out, haha.

Definitely come sing a couple songs with us on Weds nights at Dexter's or you can meet up with Chuck or John at one of their other locations. But, definitely check us out online at http://www.eviljohninc.com/ . Every karaoke song is recorded and posted onto the website so that it can be checked out later.....when you are sober and remember what you did last night!

Training My Ass Into Shape Other Than Chubby

Over the past several weeks I have been getting my lazy, out of shape ass out there running and losing some of the flab that has attached itself to me since I have stopped being active. Being an athlete all of my life.....starting with soccer, baseball, basketball, football, track & field.....I have always been working out, running, and keeping in pretty good shape. Then, I went to college and it went all down hill. Every once in a while I would pretend that I was still an athlete by playing intramural basketball or the occasional run, but I knew better. All the beer and late night Sheetz had been my down fall. For as good as that all is I started packing on the poundage and I remember tipping the scales at around 220!!!

Well, I graduated several years ago and I still have not been doing anything to get back into shape. So, with a little encouragement from friends who have been doing the best they can to get themselves back into their pre-college bodies, I have picked up a new work out program. Not having a Y or any type of gym to close to my home....and the unfortunate fact that I don't have a job right now to pay for a membership.....I have been running several miles everyday, along with sit-ups, push-ups, and a ghetto version of the P 90 X routine for my abs.

I am happy to say that I am certainly seeing an improvement....slowly, but surely. For the first time, since High School, I have weighed in less then 200 lbs. I actually weighed myself earlier and I came in at 195.00.

I still have some work to do....another 15-20 lbs to lose and a bit more distance to add on to my running. All of this is leading up to a half marathon run that I am planning on running in Sept with my rockstar friend. Everyday that I go running I curse her name, but I certainly dont mean it. I just need someway to vent, because God knows he did not give me a body built for distance. In all of the sports I have played I have only done sprints. The most I use to run was for football, and that was only doing 2 laps around the football field. So, as you can tell, the fact that I am able to run 5 miles right now is a huge accomplishment. But, I have to keep losing the weight and keep the distance going if I am going to be able to finish this race!

...And once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been, and there you long to return...

Tattoo Thoughts

Since my 25th birthday I have been on what most people would probably call a "mid-life" crisis. I like to call it being "reborn" and starting over again. A day before my birthday I lost my job, which just showed me that I have to start doing something that I really love. Then I jumped out of an airplane from 10,000 ft and survived, which has shown me that I can survive almost anything. Hence, me planning on skydiving A LOT more times and becoming a certified instructor. Now, I am also planning on getting my first (of what I believe will be many more) tattoos.

I have put much thought into what and into where I will get this milestone. Since it will be my first tat, and my family would murder me if they knew I had one, I have decided on getting it in a very unnoticable spot....my forehead...haha, joking. I believe that my right thigh is going to be the most oppurtune place for it. I know some people have said that that is not a good spot, because no one will be able to see it. This I really don't care about, because this tattoo is for myself. It will only mean something to me, and I could really care if anyone sees it or even approves of it.

Then came the thoughts of what I was going to get. I wanted something that would be close to my heart and something that I would never regret. I have been working on a Celtic Knot design that is going to be going all the way around my right thigh.

The Celtic Knot will entail 2 different designs. The first being a knot that stands for my last name, Byrnes. Byrnes is Gaelic and comes from the name O'Byrne or Byrne (the O means "son of"). Byrne can even be traced back even further to Bran, which stands for "raven". With my last name standing for "raven", I have decided to go with a knot consisting of ravens.

The 2nd design that I am going with is a Celtic band that will be going all the way around my thigh. My mother's maiden name is Murphy, a very very Irish name. It is also Gaelic and comes from the name Murchadh, which gets broken down to muir (sea) and cath (battle). Together, the two stand for "Sea Warrior", which just shows you why Murphy is such a dominant and important name.

So, I have taken an old Gaelic Warrior band, and Sea design and have produced a thick band that will extend out of the Raven Knot and go all the way around my thigh, while leaving a small break on the inside of my leg. As everyone knows, you cannot have any tattoo go all the way around any part of your body, because then when you pass away your soul will be unable to leave your body. I believe that this is an old Indian belief.

I am so excited to receive my first tattoo, and I can't wait to see how it ends up. Now, I just have to find a tattoo artist that I can trust will do a great job and that I can see myself coming back to in the future. Because, like skydiving, I believe I will become addicted to tattoos.

Once I receive my first tat, I will def post a picture.

Recap of The Dark Knight

Oh my God! I believe that The Dark Knight might have become my new favorite movie. From the first scene, with the Capped Crusader, my attention was captured. The performances by each actor was absolutely phenomenal.

Even with the fact that the movie is 2 1/2 hrs long, it certainly did not feel like it. There was so much going on throughout the entire story, and action packed scenes one right after the other insured that my A.D.D. could not take over.

With all the talk of Heath Ledger receiving an Oscar nomination, and even possibly winning with this performance, I thought that it was rather far fetched. Especially since movies like this one (Ironman, Incredible Hulk, Fantastic 4, X-Men, etc.) are never put into the same level as Forrest Gump or Silence of the Lambs, which both had received awards for Best Actor. But, the performance that I watched this evening completely blew me away. I had never thought, from the first moment I heard Ledger was going to play The Joker, that he would be able to pull it off. I kept picturing him in his roles in The Patriot and A Knight's Tale (I never saw Brokeback Mountain) and just couldn't see how he would be able to fill the role of the psychologically demented serial killer of The Joker.

Ledger definitely proved me wrong, along with many other critics, I am sure. He fit the role, dare I say, better than Jack Nicholson in the 1989 rendition of Batman, even though I could see certain instances throughout The Dark Knight that would remind me of Jacks performance. The way Ledger carried himself was a sure reminder, but he put his own touch into this deep role. Which, I believe, is the reason he passed away from a drug overdose. In order for an actor to play a role, they must walk in the footsteps of the character, and I think that the shoes of The Joker were a bit much for him. He did leave us with a performance that will never be forgotten and will, no doubt, cement his name into The Batman legend.

There were also some twists that you never see coming and additions to the story that you would think would be saved for another film. But, they fit perfectly into the film. I will not go into any depth, because I don't want to ruin anything.

Overall, I was very impressed with the film and I recommend, to everyone, to go see it as soon as you can....even go back a second time, because I am planning on it. Just make sure that you get there early. Seats are filling up quick and showings are selling out in a blink of an eye.

It Finally Arrived!!!

My skydiving video finally arrived today!!! I am sooo damn excited for it. Check it out and let me know what you think!