A Fresh New Start

Well, things have been going pretty well for me recently, since I have been back in NJ. I am happy to be back where I belong, I have had a good job with great people, I am close to my family again, which I love, and I have reconnected with friends who I lost touch with.

Even with all of this, I have still felt like something was missing. I have not been able to put my finger on it, and I still have not been able to. But, I think that the events of the recent past will help lead me into the direction in order to find it.

Approximately one month ago my company let go of most of its employees. Luckily I was held on to as one of the remaining loan officers. Even though it was a privilege to be kept on, I also had a hint of survivors guilt and also a voice in the back of my head saying "It is time to move on and find a new job. Things don't look too good here."

All throughout yesterday, at work, there was a certain aura that was going around. Rumors of the company folding, and talk about updating resumes. With all of this going around no one was working. We were all bull shitting and gossiping on what we had heard.

After a while, I was called into the conference room by the center sales manager and his right hand man. I sat there as they started discussing what was going on. They mentioned how things have been difficult with the company and that the two of them, along with a couple other employees, had been offered positions at another company. With that said, they told me that Castle Point would be closing its doors in a matter of two weeks, and that as of right then, I was being let go.

I sat there and talked with the two of them a little longer, explaining plans for the future and realizing to myself that this was probably the best thing that could happen to me.

I walked out to my desk, packed up some things, said fair well to my co workers and walked out of CPM for the last time. Not sad, not upset, not down in the slightest fashion. I felt as if a weight had been lifted off my chest. I felt like the sun was brighter and I was relieved.

I believe that this was the best time that this could happen. I don't know what the next step is for me, but I know it will be the right one. And, with today being my 25th birthday, I think it is the perfect time to make a fresh start and begin the next chapter of my life.